In the wake of the massive changes being done around the Disney Parks, it is hard to ignore the massive outcry against these changes. And in some circles, people welcome them with open arms. Any die hard Disney fan knows that removing or even refurbishing an attraction is sacrilege, and changing it to fit the mold of a profitable Disney property is even more aggravating. To the rest of the population who isn't obsessed with Disney Parks, they see it as something new and exciting to experience with their families, so they can keep up the family tradition with that annual trip to Disney World.

Except this. No one is looking forward to this.

For better or worse, these changes will continue to exist. Walt said it himself, "Disneyland will never be completed. It will continue to grow as long as there is imagination left in the world." So the core belief of Disney Parks is something we all don't want to see. It's a contradictory nature, as these attractions are part of our identity, part of our lives, yet in order to believe in the concept of the Disney parks, we have to accept that they will always be changing. Now we get into a quantity v. quality issue, where there isn't much thought put into decisions in terms of sustainability, but wholly based on profits and figures, so to speak.

Not pictured: Eisner dancing on Disney's grave.

With the closure and refurbishment of many classic attractions in the past 15 years, we catch a glimpse into the way EPCOT works. It was the awkward but very bright and intelligent theme park that struggled, but impacted all of us on a whole other level. Having a theme relating to technology is tricky, as technology advances faster than Imagineers can dream up new dreams. Rides become outdated, the crowds dwindle, and the execs see that something needs to happen to keep the families spending money. So you jazz it up, and don't look back at anyone who might be alienated by these decisions. Soarin' has about as much to do with the Land as, well, the The Caballeros has to do with Mexico.

I suppose Mexico is close enough to South America.

At a certain point, Disney decides to take the ride in a new direction, and runs with it, the wrong way. The need to update certain attractions makes sense: CommuniCore is technologically outdated, The Universe Of Energy & Symbiosis are very dry and heavy-handed (but still totally and utterly AMAZING), and World Of Motion was... I don't know, were there too many omni-mover attractions so they wanted to jazz it up with a fast thrill ride? Maybe. All you had was Body Wars and Maelstrom for a thrill, and they weren't even that thrilling. Just jerky.

I blame this ride for my achy back.

Journey Into Imagination is a curious little attraction. Delayed opening, yet it gave us Figment as a mascot for the park. Since they initially tried to shy away from incorporating established characters from the Disney echelon, it was unique to see a separation of Disney characters. If you wanted Mickey, Minnie, Pluto, Goofy, and the like, you had to go to Magic Kingdom. If you wanted to drink around the world and hang out with the elderly, you went to EPCOT Center.

Turning World Showcase into a joke, one drink at a time.

Journey Into Imagination transcended all the rides at EPCOT Center, as it presented us with an abstract idea: imagination. All other rides were based upon research and actual, physical things pertaining to their corresponding theme. Topics of transportation, energy, communication, agriculture, and the colonization of new frontiers were more or less tangible and concrete ideas; they had a basis in reality. Journey Into Imagination dealt with a topic that is very abstract, and putting those abstract ideas into a ride was certainly a challenge.

But they did it. They succeeded.

When you recall the original attraction, it played out very nicely: setting you up with the Dreamfinder touching on several aspects of imagination, and then experiencing them in various sections of the ride. There was no forced conflict or dilemma; it simply just explored imagination. Of course, when something works at Disney, it means it needs to go through a change after fifteen years. And its subsequent incarnations are nothing more than a downward shame spiral. Instead of feeling inspired, you feel like you're stuck with a stuffy imagination professor and an overbearing purple dragon. And the latter version does not make you feel inspired. Just confused.

Why is he such a dick to Figment?

Since most attractions are getting face-lifts, persistent rumors emerge about Journey Into Imagination. We've all heard them, so I won't venture down that avenue. But in all our wishful thinking, we want to see a return to the original Journey Into Imagination. Not only to fulfill and satisfy our own needs and desires of restoring a piece of our childhoods, but for a greater good.
Journey Into Imagination, simply put, is timeless. When you revisit it, there's nothing dated or old about it. The ideas it presents are universal, therefor does not have a time limit on its ideas. When you look at how rapidly technology and ideas change, imagination does not, and something from 30 years ago still feels as fresh and exciting.

Seeing your picture on the screen is still amazing.

The idea of refurbishing or re-purposing an attraction at Disney is, we all know, very costly and time-consuming. It's got to be a hit, and they are not taking any chances. Curiously, the thought of reinstating Journey Into Imagination isn't all too far-fetched in certain circumstances when you analyze certain evidence. There has been an entire D23 exhibit based on recreating the ride through various forms of media, which looks like there is a consistent interest in the original attraction. To a lesser extent, there was a campaign to bring back Figment in the second iteration of the ride, but we got a less than equitable compromise: more Figment in a ride that shouldn't have existed in the first place.

Stop teasing us.

"I don't think Figment is going anywhere any time soon, I promise." -Bob Iger

Hearing is not believing, obviously, as was the case with the Phineas & Ferb rumor circulating around, but it is known that the higher-ups at Disney know Figment is popular, and people young and old like him (we hope). And let's not forget the resurrection of Captain EO and The Enchanted Tiki Room. Granted, the former was due large in part to the public's overwhelming demand for Michael Jackson after his death, and it didn't take Disney too long (13 years or so) to realize that the latter was utterly awful and should never have been (or due to a fire, depending on who you ask).

Please let Disney not change it by inserting more characters from Aladdin and/or Lion King

So Disney has the capacity and the intentions of bringing back old rides that they deem popular enough to satisfy the masses, they've been hinting at it, and all signs seem to say, "We can bring back Journey Into Imagination," but I won't be holding my breath until then. So make it snappy.

"I felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced. I fear something terrible has happened."

Maybe that's being a little too dramatic. Disney Parks Blog made it abundantly clear what is happening to our beloved Maelstrom. And I, for one... am not shocked. At all. Disney has a penchant for this sort of thing.

Case, and motherfuckin' point.

This is to say that the closure of Maelstrom isn't a travesty. It is. I've seen the Internet implode upon itself with the uproar of protest. Maybe not implode, but the voices are being heard. The closure of Maelstrom will signal the end of the original rides that have not been changed since their opening (Impressions De France being a notable exception). A little piece of semi-original EPCOT Center will be removed from our collective consciousness forever. We will no longer have the pleasure of encountering trolls, semi-terrifying polar bears, and the piece de resistance, this:

Because when I think of Norway, I think of cruise directors.

And some other gems that the ride offers, like the smell of "Disney Water," which is one of my favorite things about Walt Disney World, no joke. The biggest loss, of course, is the short film, "The Spirit Of Norway." A wonderful film that captures Norway as it existed in 1988, and strangely does not look dated some 25+ years later. With all the broken hearts over the loss of a beloved attraction, there is a strange thing occurring on forums other than Tumblr. For instance, in the comments section of Disney Parks Blog, the news is met with arms wide open (although the idea of Disney censoring unfavorable comments from irate fans could be plausible, but I don't care much for that facet of thinking). There are people out there who genuinely favor a Frozen-themed attraction at EPCOT. I can't align myself with agreeing with them, but it does shed some light on a few things.

Disney knows what the people want. They know what the families want. Families love Frozen. Naturally there is a correlation there and Disney is making the most out of it. As mentioned prior, we are but a small minority among the Disney echelon. A lot of people out there who frequent the parks are happy to see an update to Maelstrom. And as much as we despise the idea of dumping Disney properties in the middle of a theme park that was originally intended to bridge the gap between cultures, it is an ugly truth that we must live with. Like, well, The Seas With Nemo.

Any way you look at it, Maelstrom was the first attempt at bringing in a "thrill" ride to EPCOT Center after the inauguration of Michael Eisner in the mid-1980's. So it doesn't quite fit into the mold of EPCOT's original mission. When you dissect the ride, it's a little jilted. You get a gentle boat ride with a glimpse into the life of seafaring explorers fearless of no body of water (or Vikings), a part of Norwegian history, but then you get a spell cast upon you by trolls (the obligatory Disney spin to create conflict within a situation that does not warrant such), and then you get to see polar bears (debatable whether you can find them on mainland Norway, as opposed to Svalbard), then to the base of an offshore drilling platform (part of Norway's heritage when it comes to paying the bills) and then into a quiet coastal town where you disembark from your Oseberg ship.

The true spirit of Norway. Don't let the trolls fool you.

The inclusion of the trolls doesn't fit into the feel of the ride in the context of "original EPCOT," although if you take it out, then you're left with just a gentle stroll down various fjords and into the North Sea. And that can't be too exciting, unless you play up the forces of nature to invoke some sort of response. In that case you'd just be on the Norwegian version of El Rio Del Tiempo. But the ride itself tries to add a bit of excitement to an otherwise benign ride, and to the execs of the Disney Corporation in the 80's, when you had a theme park that wasn't as profitable as the Magic Kingdom, you need something to bring the families in so they don't go Sea World.

Frozen is here to stay, whether we like it or not. We've heard the song to no end, and you can guarantee that you'll be hearing some permutation of that song in one way, shape, or form in the ride. Yes, it's a passing fad, and might suffer the same fate as The Seas With Nemo. There is a force more powerful than all of us, and as much as we want Maelstrom to stay and not change, it is going to. I know it sounds hopelessly pessimistic, but I've come to terms with the direction EPCOT is headed in. They've broken my heart many, many times. It's borderline an abusive relationship, with all that I give them (money & years of dedication) and in return they take the things I love away from me. All one can do is remember it, take lots of pictures before it's refurbished, and constantly watch the Spirit Of Norway film, because it is amazing. And shot in glorious 70mm by Paul Gerber, of Symbiosis and The Seas fame.

So marks the end of an era. I am saddened by this news. I'm not shocked, but still saddened. I can see why this upsets people. Just let me know it's last date of operation so I can ride it one last time, see the film one more time, and drop a single rose on its doorstep, in memory of another fallen ride at Walt Disney's EPCOT Center.