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| Well it was either Universe Of Energy or Horizons that had the shuttle launch footage. |
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| Steady annual visits since 1986. I look fucking thrilled. |
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| This was their Image Works. |
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| It's important to know this version is inferior. |
9. World Of Motion
The World Of Motion had an interesting look and design, essentially a giant wheel, but the topic of transportation, cars, and the future of it was lost on me. The animatronics were definitely flat and uninteresting, although the caveman blowing on his feet did make me chuckle. Another portion of the ride that just further confused me as a child was the "TRON tunnel" as I call it. Very ominous and foreboding, I don't think I was ready for it as a kid. What made EPCOT Center so memorable was the music, and none of it was memorable for me. The song, "It's Fun To Be Free" definitely left something to be desired. It wasn't catchy at all, like say, Tomorrow's Child, and with that, it failed to impress me. And this was definitely not a first choice ride for me. Plus, when you spend an hour in the TransCenter when you'd rather be at the Image Works, it makes you want to go insane. Sadly, I never got a chance to give World Of Motion another try as an adult, and now watching the video on YouTube, it has a certain charm and appeal, and the aesthetic is definitely fitting of early EPCOT Center, which I admire.
8. Wonders Of Life
Definitely a last ditch attempt to bring in some more people into EPCOT Center, with a little land they carved out between Horizons and the Universe Of Energy, the Wonders Of Life was this very New Age feeling pavilion, complete with some sort of Vangelis sounding music and very bright neon colors. Of course, the rides were thrilling and entertaining enough for any kid, so it's no surprise we flocked to Body Wars and Cranium Command, respectively. But there was something off about the pavilion. It didn't seem to fit in with the feel of EPCOT Center. Frontiers In Medicine was getting close to the idea of exploring new technologies and scientific advances in medicine, but on the whole, the concept of Wonders Of Life seemed more abstract than the concrete ideas of fossil fuels, aerodynamic car designs and good nutrition (Journey into Imagination being a notable exception, although that attraction seemed to possess more concrete ideas than Wonders Of Life). What was the most confusing and off putting attraction was "The Making Of Me" which explored the sensitive topic of conception and child birth. Being a squeamish child, anything relating to such things always made me nauseous and uncomfortable, so I tried to avoid that of all costs. Re-watching it, it's actually interesting in the way it is presented, and Martin Short addresses these issues frankly but not overbearingly. Still, as an eight year old, there was no way to make that appeal to me.
7. CommuniCore
CommuniCore East & West were definitely a joy for any kid, as it was the closest thing we had to play interactive games at Walt Disney World. There was a lot going on, and there was definitely a lot to do, but it was all strangely educational. And not in the fun way, like playing Number Munchers. SMRT-1 was interesting enough, getting to talk to him with an awkward clunky phone, or Backstage Magic, which just made you stand more. Future Choice Theater always sticks out in my mind, due solely to the fact that the seats were comfy as hell. And what kid doesn't love to push random buttons attached to their armrest. Disney new the appeal of allowing you to press a button, that's why they put it in Horizons. For all its innovations and technological marvel, CommuniCore didn't really draw me in like say, the Image Works, but it was a good start. Looking back, I'd kill to have something like that instead of the blatant shaming of Habit Heroes or the painfully long and confusing lines of Sum Of All Thrills. Design your own roller coaster was much more interesting.
6. The Land
What's not to love about The Land? There was always something magical about The Land. It starts when you walk up towards the entrance and see the magnificent mural painted along the sides. Truly amazing. And when you get inside, a beautifully painted ceiling with large windows to let light in, and the balloons! I'd stare at those balloons ascend and descend all day long. It had a thousand wonderful smells emitting what to us would be tasty concentrations of wonderful food! The smell of the The Land I always associate with good times, and since every kid loves fountains, it's no surprise that I loved sitting around the fountain, asking my mom for a penny to throw in. When it came down to rides, some were better than others. Kitchen Kabaret was always a favorite of mine. "Veggie Veggie Fruit Fruit" would be the standout track that made me fall in love with the Colander Combo. There was a sense of timeless, wholesome fun with catchy tunes and silly food animatronics, as opposed to the pop-culture laden parody songs of Food Rocks, which did not have staying power (similar to Pixar versus Dreamworks). Listen To The Land was a staple, mainly because it was a slow moving boat ride through types of environments where food could grow, plus the most badass part, the rotating crop drum to simulate gravity. That was the only thing that ride had to wow us, the idea of growing crops in outer space. There are definitely fond memories going into the fish farm section, with its painfully red color, but that still remains today, albeit not as exciting. Unfortunately, I never got to enjoy seeing Symbiosis at the Harvest Theater. Being obsessed with EPCOT Center (rightfully so) I never saw it, and regret it. Or maybe I saw it when I was little and don't remember a thing about it. In any case, watching it on YouTube doesn't translate its size and scope from the big 70mm projection to a tiny screen on a computer, from a poorly handheld video transfer from 1985.
5. Spaceship Earth
I know what you're thinking: is he talking about the Walter Cronkite version? The Jeremy Irons version? The first one with the narrator we don't remember his name because he wasn't interesting of famous enough? Sorry Lawrence Dobkin, but I'm speaking strictly about the 1986 version with Walter Cronkite. Always a two minute wait or less (depending on how many Brazilian tourists are visiting the park that day), Spaceship Earth was the classic omnimover ride. From the initial ascent with the woman from AT&T welcoming you, to the smells as you first see a projection of cavemen fighting a Woolly Mammoth, it is a pleasure of the senses to be on that ride. The dramatic narration of Walter Cronkite (okay, I'll admit Jeremy Irons provides an equally badass narration), the smell of Rome burning takes me back to a simpler time and the animated chariot in the Rome sequence remains among my favorite looped animations at EPCOT Center. Although the animatronics haven't changed too drastically over the past 30 years (let's not talk about the supercomputer scientist room). The most magical part of Spaceship Earth was obviously the climax of the ride, where you are the top of the ride, and you see Earth in the distance. Then you get to ride backwards with a disclaimer, which I always thought was cool. What follows is probably one of the best songs ever composed for a Disney park. Tomorrow's Child remains as one the best, and hearing it gives you goosebumps all over. The overall feel of the ride is awe inspiring; makes you want to change the world. And the best part of the ride, the exit into Future Station where you can play with the WorldKey touchscreens!
4. The Living Seas
It's entrance captivates you: a beautiful mural (Disney sure did know how to make a good mural) and a lava rock with the "Living Seas" perched atop. And who could forget the wave machine. We all stood in front of it, dad put that shutter speed to 500, and tried to capture magic. Aside from its unusually long queue and initially your inability to bypass "The Seas" movie (why would you want to? It's so perfect!), it is a very perfect attraction. Props from a bygone era of deep sea diving, multimedia presentations as you wait to go into the tiny theater to watch the dramatic film, perhaps the best film at EPCOT Center: The Seas. Seven minutes long and goosebumps that will last a lifetime, it is one of the most wonderful and beautiful short films ever committed to the park. It explores our origins as a planet, and the wonders hidden beneath its surface. It inspires you to know more, and be amazed at the wonders of life adapting to the harshest of conditions without the aid of photosynthesis. Then boarding the most amazing invention that actually did nothing: the hydrolators. The overall feel, from the lovely carpet lined walls to the undersea research facility known as SeaBase Alpha that looks like something out of a Ron Cobb design, it was magical. Seacabs were also exciting, as you got to see all sorts of sea life and pondered the question that plagued children at aquariums, "Why aren't the sharks eating the fish?" As if we all wanted to see some shark-eating-fish carnage, we were dazzled and amazed. Finally, after departing the Seacabs, you were in a world of fantastic discovery. SeaBase Alpha provided us with a multitude of information and interactive exhibits. The SeaBase Alpha Challenge tested our knowledge with information about sea exploration and conservation from the viewpoint of a 1986 era. The manatee exhibit was great as well, and seeing the divers come out of the airlock was also a sight to behold, but not as exciting as getting your picture taken inside the deep sea explorer suit. The one thing the ride suffered from was the lack of a direct route to the actual ride. A long queue followed by TWO preshow films, plus a line to get into the hydrolators, then a line to get on the seacabs, then a line to get out of the place! It seems overwhelming, but there was something magical about having to wait to get to see things. Now you can just walk in through the exit and hang out in the gutted remains of SeaBase Alpha. Who wants to do that?
3. Horizons
I know this is number one on everyone's list, and believe me, Horizons was the most amazing ride ever built. But there can only be one champion of the EPCOT Center rides, and this one is third in my book, which doesn't make it any less amazing. Horizons was that ride that began as a casual thing, but got serious as time progressed. Being one of the few that survived the 1994 massacre, and lasted way up until the late 90s, Horizons became a staple of repeat rides, just as The Peoplemover was at the Magic Kingdom. It served its main purpose at first: no lines and the coldest AC you could imagine. And after a walk around World Showcase, that's what you needed. Horizons was a delightful, fun ride, that presented us with a new type of omnimover system, where you were riding on a sort of ski-lift, adjacent to the wall. As you walk in, the Horizons fanfare fills the air, and you walk along the metal handrails and get a glimpse into the future via a kaleidoscopic view of desert living, space stations and undersea worlds. The first section was generally throw-away; nothing exciting about looking back at tomorrow (although the robot butler and spinning robot chef still remain as one of my favorite animatronics). What was the biggest winner was the OmniMax theater. Large format was in, and oh boy did Disney run with it. The spiraling into the DNA helix gives me motion sickness, and the vibrations of the space shuttle launch rumbled the seat below me, but it was a total experience that I miss dearly. Future living seemed exciting enough, the smell of oranges will never be forgotten, nor will the glimmering lights on the walls as you pass from the past to the present to the future. Of course everyone remembers "Choose Your Own Ending" which was insanely popular, and that's what made you come back for more. You had to see all the different endings. Then you got the wonderful treat in the form of a song, which was "New Horizons." It blared at the exit of the ride as you saw the sign that said, "If we can dream it, we can do it." Whether it was a Tom Fitzgerald quote or something GE put him up to, is irrelevant. The whole point is to dream big, and make it happen.
2. Journey Into Imagination
Always this ride will be special to me, and to the millions of people who got to enjoy it. It's gorgeous glass pyramids, its jumping fountains, it was a masterpiece of a pavilion. A whimsical ride, and interactive playground, a 3D movie, all to reinforce the idea of exploring the limits of our own imagination. And let's not forget the peaceful second floor of the pavilion, away from the Image Works, where the sun shined through the glass pyramids and you took in a wonderful view while sitting on blue benches. Figment and Dreamfinder defined EPCOT Center, the former most of all. The mascot the park needed, a far cry from the staples of the Disney repertoire, a brand new invention of Disney Imagineering, and thus Figment was born. Figment remains my favorite Disney character. He is that dash of childish delight. The ride itself was spectacular, and warranted repeat visits. Seeing the outline of the flying dream machine and the beginnings of the song "One Little Spark" takes me back to that special time when I was a child, running to get on the ride, and having my parents run after me so I didn't fall down out of excitement. Animatronic Figments and looped film with Figment delighted me to no end, seeing Figment stand on the stage and watch the movies he's made, even more exciting. Seeing our picture taken at the end of the ride, fan-fucking-tastic, I loved it. The Image Works provided us with even more excitement. ChromaKey performances, hexagon tiles, the sensor maze, imprinting your hand on those pin-needles or whatever they were called, the Image Works never disappointed. It's disappointing now because it doesn't exist, but at the time, you better believe it was the best thing ever. Sadly, Magic Journeys came and went before I was born, and Captain EO replaced it in the year of my birth. Although I'd watch Captain EO and be scared shitless by Angelica Huston, it was still a fun film. Magic Journeys definitely fit more into the mold of Journey into Imagination solely because it dealt with the imagination of a young boy (and equally as weird and scary as Captain EO). But even as Journey Into Imagination was a truly amazing experience, it had nothing on the most unlikely of EPCOT Center attractions...
1. Universe Of Energy
Often the subject of ridicule among the EPCOT Center rides, the Universe Of Energy is 37 minutes of dry, boring facts about the history of fossil fuels and other forms of energy that we need to harness and conserve in order to meet the growing demands of energy. There's some dinosaurs thrown in there, but it wasn't enough for the average park guest who absolutely hated this ride, especially children. The Universe Of Energy is my favorite EPCOT Center attraction of all time. There are so many factors that make this a truly unique, exciting, through provoking and overall amazing ride. Its mere aesthetic, reflective tiles that gives you a distorted view if you look into them, further plays on the theme of solar energy (or at least that's how I see it). The roofs are lined with photovoltaic cells so you can, say it with me now, "Ride On Sunshine." With many different segments, starting with the preshow, the second preshow, the prehistoric diorama, the energy information center, and then the finale, it takes a bit of time to get it going. You are on this ride for 45 minutes (37 if you came in late to the preshow), and they want to make it last. The first preshow presents you with a truly innovative process of screen rotations for dramatic effect. Radok screens, as they are called, present a new way to watch a projected image. And we get one of TWO amazing songs in one attraction (I count Journey Into Imagination as one long, continuous song). The second preshow is a little more blasé, as it just recycles animation from the Rite Of Spring segment of Fantasia, but you get a little more information about the creation of fossil fuels, which segues into what every young boy wants to see: dinosaurs. I'm convinced it is a widely regarded fact that all young boys love dinosaurs. This is what put butts into seats. And the concept is truly genius: have two giant moving theaters to accommodate large groups of people at once, instead of wasting labor on the guy who has to ask "How many in your party (or group depending on their mood)?" What I thought was the most fascinating (and loud) was the Energy Information Center, where you saw different methods of extracting fossil fuels and new ideas to conserve our natural resources (and don't forget about the rock that burns!). But perhaps the best part in the history of anything relating to EPCOT Center is the finale:
As the Disney approved hard rock guitar sound fills the air, you see wonderful computer generated wire-frames and lase of things from the seas, to the skies, and forces beyond our eyes. It shows us the wonder and magic of our own capabilities, breakthroughs in science and technology, and an optimistic future. For being dry and boring, it was surprisingly optimistic. We could accomplish anything. And the song, oh how the song is so good! Trumps any other song composed for the Walt Disney Company.
So there you have it: My picks for EPCOT Center's Future World attractions. World Showcase, current attractions, that's a bit more tricky because I dislike them pretty much equally across the board.
